How can the world look the same when so many people are dying less than a hundred miles from my house? New York City may seem like a different world from Hamden, Connecticut, but the truth is that it is very close by. Just 85 miles from my front door to where the World Trade Center used to stand.
But I'm sure every town in the US seems close to New York City today.
I heard from a friend who works at an online news service that even in the midst of all the news pouring in yesterday, it was sometimes hard to believe this was really happening, that it wasn't a nightmare. I felt it too, that need to remind myself that it was really true.
Yesterday was bad enough, with trying to understand such a huge senseless loss of life, but this morning I realized that as the reports get more individualized, things are going to feel worse and worse. We woke up to the news that as many as 800 people may have been killed in the Pentagon attack; the fire was still burning when I left for work this morning. On the way to work I was listening to NPR, and heard a woman being interviewed whose husband worked at the World Trade Center and is still unaccounted for. Her voice was desparate and hysterical. "The worst part is not knowing. I wish I could just go and dig for him myself. What if he's dying and I'm not there to hold his hand? What if he's hurt and I can't help him?"
Then I got to work and read the articles about the people on the planes who had called their wives or moms or husbands by cell phone as the planes were being hijacked. And the people who are still calling this morning on cell phones from underneath the rubble in New York. And the rescue workers at the trade center talking about picking through thousands of body parts in the search for survivors. And hearing just how many of the firefighters are unaccounted for in New York -- they are saying 300 right now. And when you multiply each of these heartwrenching stories by the thousands of people who died yesterday, it just becomes really overwhelming, trying to take it all in.
In a way I think things are just going to keep becoming harder and harder, until we either find some outlet for our anger and bewilderment or become hardened to these stories in some way. On top of my sadness for all these people who died or who lost loved ones, I am worried and scared about what that will do to America.
But I'm sure every town in the US seems close to New York City today.
I heard from a friend who works at an online news service that even in the midst of all the news pouring in yesterday, it was sometimes hard to believe this was really happening, that it wasn't a nightmare. I felt it too, that need to remind myself that it was really true.
Yesterday was bad enough, with trying to understand such a huge senseless loss of life, but this morning I realized that as the reports get more individualized, things are going to feel worse and worse. We woke up to the news that as many as 800 people may have been killed in the Pentagon attack; the fire was still burning when I left for work this morning. On the way to work I was listening to NPR, and heard a woman being interviewed whose husband worked at the World Trade Center and is still unaccounted for. Her voice was desparate and hysterical. "The worst part is not knowing. I wish I could just go and dig for him myself. What if he's dying and I'm not there to hold his hand? What if he's hurt and I can't help him?"
Then I got to work and read the articles about the people on the planes who had called their wives or moms or husbands by cell phone as the planes were being hijacked. And the people who are still calling this morning on cell phones from underneath the rubble in New York. And the rescue workers at the trade center talking about picking through thousands of body parts in the search for survivors. And hearing just how many of the firefighters are unaccounted for in New York -- they are saying 300 right now. And when you multiply each of these heartwrenching stories by the thousands of people who died yesterday, it just becomes really overwhelming, trying to take it all in.
In a way I think things are just going to keep becoming harder and harder, until we either find some outlet for our anger and bewilderment or become hardened to these stories in some way. On top of my sadness for all these people who died or who lost loved ones, I am worried and scared about what that will do to America.
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